@Child #1

Pinterest Party Prick…

September 13, 2016

So it happened.. a few weeks ago I became the type of parent I hate. The type of parent that I mutter swear words about under my breathe whilst viewing their perfectness on Pinterest of an evening, as I sit on my jam stained sofa in leggings with holes in the crotch, a pint of gin in hand. Don’t get me wrong, Pinterest would be a dark and dismal place if it was all brutal reality, its full of inspirational images for a reason.

Anyway as a parent I love and hate Pinterest in equal measure at times. On one hand it inspires me to be that crafty mum organising fun garden play for the summer holidays and on the other it makes me feel like crap when I realise the extent of my rainy day play repertoire as a mum is putting Netflix on and providing Monster Munch as viewing snacks.

But for Houdini’s Birthday a few weeks ago I went all Pinterest Party Prick on my friends and threw the most over the top Dinosaur party for a four year old.

Here is my attempt at lifestyle blog esq. beauty with some of the pictures from the day:

dsc_0051Fossil hunting Fun for four year olds, the reality I didn’t invisage: Not so fun for two shattered parents who’d been making fossil eggs for the last 6 evenings and had to shovel two tons of sand into the sand box – and back out again four hours later.

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dsc_0945dsc_0955dsc_0940Romantic table setting with Dinosaurs in party hats and Dino Themed food? The Reality a huge tantrum occurred when Houdini realised they were his toys from home and other people might touch them. The tears over turkey Dinosaurs that happened when we ran out of triceratops shaped ones and only diplodocus was left!

dsc_0949All I’m going to say is do not hold a sign that reads ‘Feed the Dinosaur’ in front of your crotch at work. References to a ‘vaginasaur’ are not appropriate in a working environment… just saying.
dsc_0798Thank you for manning the glitter tattoo station #BadAuntie – so I had a glitter tattoo station because all Dinosaur hunters have a glitter tattoo, not because I bought a kit on Amazon in a sleep deprived panic that we didn’t have party games.

What can I say, I allowed myself to get carried away with the beautiful lives I see on the internet. As you can see I may have been crafting till the wee hours to pull this bad boy off by my skills as a stylist/ photographer are nowhere near Pinterest standards.

I made up for my lack lustre parenting with some good cake game and a massively over the top birthday party. A few of the school mums mentioned they needed to up there party game after attending. But the truth is when I asked Houdini what his favourite bit was he said “fighting with the dinosaurs” he was referring to the point he and two friends beat the crap out of each other with inflatable Dinosaurs.

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He had a fab party but the moral of this story is your child does not care about Pinterest and will love their party whether you make party hats for Dinosaur toys or not.

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Mates. Cake. that is essentially all you need to throw your child a party. Everything else is for the adults egos and really not required! Sorry, I’ll try not to be a Pinterest party prick moving forward, although may have to do it just once more so Miss Penny doesn’t come across as the less loved second child in December!?

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I’ve just been shortlisted for the Mumsnet blogging awards 2016 in the Best Writer & Best Comic Writer categories.

I’m totally chuffed to bits about being shortlisted, but would dearly love to become a finalist. So if you like reading my blog and you have 98 seconds to spare then use the links below to vote for me to be a finalist!

A huge thanks to all those who nominated me, I’m still beyond excited about being shortlisted, thank you thank you thank you!

http://www.mumsnet.com/events/blogging-awards/2016/best-writer

http://www.mumsnet.com/events/blogging-awards/2016/best-comic-writer

 

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